Day 5 Freewrite

It's day 5 of class...how did we get to this point? I have felt such a range of energy levels that I don't think my body knows where it stands this week. I have felt defeated and powerful. Stifled by choice and free to create. I have been out of all loops in the social world, missing major news stories, and I have been more focused, thinking about things ideas that I wouldn't have before. Questioning everything move I make and ignoring practical functions of the day (meals, laundry, etc.) In other words...I've been conflicted. But it was completely worth it. 


Today I was dragging on the walk in to class. My shoulder hurts. I feel like I should have gotten further on my photo story. I burnt my tongue, and let me tell you, that's the worst blow of all of my trials and tribulations. But as I walked I thought about how I have felt this way every morning this week at some point before I get there, but I don't feel it when I reach the class. My thinking changes when I am surrounded by such passionate, proficient, motivating learners. Everyone cares and everyone exchanges such meaningful, interesting ideas. When I see the work and the fun and the true growth/enthusiasm of everyone around me, I am a different person. I will be lost when I don't have someone to share with, when conversations don't immediately turn to the process and what's the best way to facilitate learning, although I can share on the blogs of course. 


Last week or so, one of the bloggers I've been following (stalking, really) in an attempt to gain as many lesson ideas as possible wrote this post about her students using Google Docs to create tweets collaboratively. [By the way, she posts some fantastic resources--if you are a teacher, I recommend following her for some great reflections and ideas.]  I think this lesson is so incredibly versatile - I could see myself using the general framework for character studies in almost any novel (speaking to point of view or motivations) but it's not limited to literature. They could collaboratively tweet to summarize an article they will use for a research project (as Troy mentioned) or to tell a story using shortened, concise phrases. I love that I am finding resources to recycle! 


One more quick thought in this directionless post: I keep thinking (and speaking to people about again and again) about my photo story's quality. Did I capture what I wanted to? Probably not. Did I produce an aesthetically invigorating piece that will do what I say a digital story should do? Not a chance. But was this process about my deep and creative thoughts? Not really. I don't have any confidence in the piece, but I have to remember that this was a quick and dirty learning process. I used about 48 hours to create this, as did everyone else. So get past it, Kauffmann! I won't have a polished piece right now because that wasn't the goal of it all. By stating this aloud (or online), I'm just affirming what everyone already knew. So slowly I'm getting over my fear that people will see my work, and thinking about all that we've learned and how I've gone from nothing to something. Something that required choices galore, and certainly required me to think critically about my theme, sequence, and the way to represent my thoughts. I've had to combat and overcome challenges that my students may face. 


So how do we avoid stress over the product and teach the values of the doing the project? We have been trained to worry about the assignment, worry what our teacher wants...I remember a conversation I had with a friend in another class this summer about how hard it was to write the first paper because she didn't know what the professor graded like. And I thought about how we all felt that, but that it wasn't how it should be. Of course I can speculate about what should be all day long, but I hope to counteract this feeling that we have to write for an end. I want to focus on the means to the end.